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Top 10 Marketing Blunders
July 9, 2001
PM Editor, Steve Smith, explains the "Top 10 Marketing Blunders" sometimes made by contractors.
10
Give away bongs with the sale of every service agreement.
9
Partner with kozmo.com. No, wait a minute! Make that webvan.com . . . or make that priceline.com.
8
Blame any problem on the last guy who was there. When it turns out to really be you, calmly reply: "Oh, so I see you've met my evil twin."
7
Offer to pick up a gallon of milk on the way to each service call.
6
Stand outside the local Home Depot with a megaphone and repeat over and over again: "Do not enter the House of Satan."
5
GivePMeditor $5,000 and actually expect a cover story.
4
Become known as the "Can't Do Plumber."
3
Since quality starts on the inside, show your commitment by having your techs wear their underwear on the outside of their pants.
2
Instruct your call-takers to end every sentence with, "Frickin' right, we'll fix it."
1
Change business name to "Pikachu Plumbing & Heating."